In Costa Rica, young gay boys are coming OUT much sooner, as evidenced on any given Sunday at La Avispa, one of the oldest and BEST gay clubs in San Jose Costa Rica.
*There's a VIDEO we did of La Avispa below, CHECK out all the cute, young faces of Gay Costa Rica.
Finally, Gay takes a positive step forward in Costa Rica. WHOO HOO! I always LOVE hearing good GAY news in Costa Rica where 'gay' and 'good news' rarely go together.
There was an article in one of the Spanish newspapers, La Teja, about how young gay Tico boys are coming out of the proverbial CLOSET earlier and earlier. La Teja reported many gay youth are claiming their homosexuality between the
ages of 12-15. WOW! I think we all know how hard that is in the BEST of circumstances and believe me, especially in Costa Rica but I give serious PROPS to ANY young gay boy or girl who can come OUT at such a young age. I've written about it on many occasion how difficult GAY can be in Costa Rica. And of course I put most of the blame where it belongs, squarely on the shoulders of Archbishop Hugo Barrantes and the Roman Catholic Church, who are obviously on a Crusade to make being gay very difficult. This is Barrantes lookin all Catholic.
My Spanish isn't all that, but I think I understood most of the article and unfortunately it wasn't all good gay news. Where there's progress there's usually some problems as well. In this case, the schools and Costa Rican society in general aren't quite sure how to handle GAY... and gay at such a young age. So as you might suspect, these young gay kids have run into various degrees of discrimination, humiliation and prejudicial treatment for who they are. School seems to be a particular concern because teachers and administrators appear ill equipped (or unwilling) to deal with such a sensitive issue. The article even mentioned the Harvey Milk High School in New York City, which was designed to be a safe space for students regardless of sexual orientation. A school like Harvey Milk in Costa Rica would be perfect now, although progress is being made, much of the country still regards homosexuality as a sin... gay Tico's need a safe place to LEARN.
Obviously, more needs to be done. Families of gay, as well as the folks who teach them need to be educated and given the tools to deal with their young gay minds... and ALL the issues that come with being GAY. But all in all, the fact young gay Tico's are coming OUT sooner, is a great positive step. Anytime GAY is being discussed- that's a good thing.
Here's a video we did about a protest outside the Gran Hotel in San Jose, Costa Rica. I loved the FACT their were a LOT of young GAY Tico's showing their support at this protest:
And here's the La Avispa Video. ENjoY!
TONS of Costa Rica Travel Info and VIDEOS on our website: Travel Costa Rica NOW and if you want to visit our YouTube Channel: iCostaRica24 ENjoY!
Hotel Villa Decary in Nuevo Arenal (about 50 minutes from La Fortuna) is both 'gay owned and operated' and 'gay-friendly' and would probably be GAY ONLY if it wasn't located so far from La Fortuna. For the record- it's hard to do 'gay only' in the rainforest when it's fairly far from a major tourist destination.
As the video BELOW will bare out- Villa Decary is a great option for any 'gay' or 'straight' folks who don't want to be smack in the middle of anything 'touristy' and appreciate B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L surroundings, complete with animals.
Give me a camera and I'm ready to GO.
Villa Decary is not only beautiful, but it is also known for a few other things as well, great for birding, (I think we spent hours watching the Montezuma Oropendela's feed their young while having morning coffee) and speaking of the morning, the breakfast at Villa Decary is to die for...love the fresh breads. Villa Decary also has like a million different types of palm trees on the property because of the previous owner's interest in palm trees.
Living as a gay man or gay couple in Costa Rica is a LOT different than traveling as 'gay' in Costa Rica.
Costa Rica LOVES to market itself as an extremely 'gay friendly' travel destination but I can tell you, living here gay is a completely other matter.
Our belief about living gay in Costa Rica is that Costa Rica takes former President Clinton’s, ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy for military gays, one step further- culminating in, ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, andDon’t ACT’…… GAY in Costa Rica. Most Costa Ricans have the exact same attitudes toward gay folks as the majority of North Americans held back in the ‘50’s and ‘60’s. Read that as- ‘IT’S A SIN.’ However, it should be noted; Ticos are some of the nicest people on the planet, and wouldn’t normally think about discriminating you to your face. We’ll get back to that later.
For this post:*Acting gay does NOT mean swishing your ass back and forth with a pink boa draped around your neck. For this article, ‘acting gay’ is defined as hand-holding and any other public displays of affection that straight persons would enjoy without fear of repercussion. Seriously, WTF does acting ‘gay’ mean anyway? Are you acting ‘straight’? So, it’s an act? If acting gay is swishing your ass and talking with a lisp, then acting straight must mean tight jeans, leather jacket and saying the f-word a lot. Could these be stereotypes?Ummmmmm.
Many gays that live here in Costa Rica voiced that we should act as ‘gay’ as we want out in public; as that’s the only way the country will eventually change its attitudes and views regarding homosexuals. That is indeed true, but it won’t be at OUR expense. The most effective ‘POSITIVE’ impact will come from gay Ticos themselves. As gringo’s living here, we are not viewed as real citizens (and WE'RE not), and in fact, would come across like we’re ‘pushing’ our gayness where it’s not wanted, which also won't win any points. Although I do realize BEING who you are in public can help shed some of the misconceptions with some folks. But therein lies the problem.
A Brief History: We live in La Fortuna, and most people know we’re ‘those gay gringos who live next to the park,’ and we do get left alone. It should also be noted, we’re not HUGE fans of public displays of affection by ANYONE, but I’ll admit it would be nice to stroll around the park, or anywhere for that matter, holding hands, or stealing the occasional kiss (ok, we’ve done it a few times,,,whatever). The irony is Tico’s LOVE to ‘make-out’ in public, and often appear to be about 2-seconds from doin' the nasty at any given time. The other irony, La Fortuna is home to an unusually high number of gay Ticos, C-L-O-S-E-T-E-D, but numerous nonetheless.
You’ll frequently hear many other gay, expat gringos say they’re ACCEPTED by their ‘straight’ Tico friends, or by the community in general in which they live. This is probably true, but only because the gay couple in question, act in public, as if they’re merely friends. I got a million bucks saying unless you knew they were gay, and you might, you wouldn’t necessarily KNOW they were gay. Knowing ‘gay’ and seeing the act of ‘gay’ are entirely two different things- know what I mean? So they fulfill the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, and especially the Don’t ACT’ policy to a tee. So why wouldn’t they be accepted? Let them start ‘acting gay’ and rest assured, things would be quite different very quickly.
When we first arrived in Costa Rica they may have thought we were gay but they weren't sure...which is the way they like it.
Flaunting your gayness in Costa Rica will NOT get you an invitation to Christmas dinner at the mother of your ACCEPTING Tico friend. Will they discriminate against you to your face? Maybe, maybe not, but paa..leeez, Ticos, might be nice to your face but they can also become extremely passive/aggressive when they feel they've been disrespected. Especially disrespected in such a sinful, immoral, blatantly gay way. You WILL BE discriminated against in the most subtle of ways- waiters/bartenders become a little slower (not sure that’s possible here), paper work remains at the bottom of the stack longer, more mean-spirited stares and whispering by resident rednecks and you can definitely feel the 'distance' many will keep once they know you're gay.
Personally, we’ve been blatantly discriminated against, in probably the most popular restaurant in La Fortuna, Don Rufino’s. It was U-G-L-Y. One of the owners had no problem loudly voicing his dislike and disdain for “us GAYS” in front of about 15-20 patrons. And take my word for it, not one person had the guts to stand with US- Ticos or Gringos, friends or not. We have NEVER set foot in their AGAIN.
We haven't stepped a foot inside of Don Rufino's for the past 5 years now.
What is TRUE, if you’re ONLY visiting Costa Rica, gay couples can often get away with MUCH MORE gay-like behavior. Tico’s just figure it’s those, ‘CRAZY, GAY, GRINGOS,’
“Let’s at least get their money before they 'S-W-I-S-H' back to where ever it is they came from.”
Just remember, why do you think 80% of gay Ticos are STILL in the CLOSET? The exact same reason it can still be difficult to 'come OUT' in the STATES- Matthew Shepard was NOT that long ago and some are extremely uncomfortable with the possibility of losing their entire family- Yeah, it happens here, a LOT.
Mine and D'Angelos Video: Gay Traveler vs. Living GAY in Costa Rica. Hope it Helps!
TONS of Costa Rica Travel Info and VIDEOS on our website: Travel Costa Rica NOW and if you want to visit our YouTube Channel: iCostaRica24 ENjoY!
For the Record, my view is this: SEX between 2 or more consenting adults - CASE CLOSED - after all, they're consenting adults and it's NONE of my or anybody else's business. If you care, that's YOUR problem.
Anyway, these are merely MY observations based on my experiences; hardly scientific to say the least. I don't want to spread inaccuracies about gay men in Costa Rica, but something is amiss, because I’ve had enough sexual encounters with gay Costa Ricans in the last 7 years to draw some conclusions in regards to their sexual ‘irresponsibility'. Just so we're clear, I'm not talking about prostitution, although I would bet the gay prostitutes and trannies here are MORE apt to use a condom. But I digress.
The gay men were between the ages of 18-34. ALL would be considered educated in direct correlation with their age. Most were ‘BOTTOMS,’ and yes, I think that's important. Most were ‘closeted,’ also important. Many would be considered a ‘hook-up,’ while others were more like ‘friends with benefits.’ They all knew I had a boyfriend.
Sex is defined as PENETRATION. The FACT of the matter is, NOT ONE TICO DEMANDED the use of a condom when it came right down to it (remember, most were BOTTOMS). Don’t get me wrong, many times condom use would be discussed but for whatever reason would become a formality and quickly dismissed. Ultimately, THEY DIDN’T CARE, or at least, care seemed to fly out the window the moment we were butt-ass naked and turning back didn’t seem to be an option. Not one of them actually knew I put one on and if they were ‘TOPPING’, of course it was DEMANDED, but again, they wouldn't have 'wrapped up' unless I told them to. *I know you want to hear numbers, SORRY, let’s just my experiences were enough to form some ‘scary’ conclusions.
Afterwards, I would ask them why they didn't demand I wear a condom but I think you could guess as to the ‘whys’ - the excuses seem somewhat UNIVERSAL whether you're in the States or here in Costa Rica: Impaired judgment from alcohol/drugs. Blind Hope/Trust/Faith in 'me' the partner. Caught-up in the moment. Then of course there's always the one about I wanted to 'feel' it in me... whatever.*None were ignorant to the fact a condom should be used. I could go on and on about what someone may or may not have been thinking, but the bottom line is- the SEX would have happened regardless of a condom.
FYI- currently there are approximately 13,000 people living in Costa Rica with HIV/AIDS and don't even get me started on the STD's running rampant here.
And this is the REASON for the post- Visiting 'GAY' Costa Rica? Want to sample the local flavor? Want to be the kid in the candy store? Sweet, no problem...... but WRAP THAT SHIT UP... because odds are, the Ticos won't... or haven't.. and it's much better returning to the States with fond gay memories of the cute little Tico boy at the beach than a yellowish discharge escaping from your penis.
Know what I mean?
TONS of Costa Rica Travel Info and VIDEOS on our website: Travel Costa Rica NOW and if you want to visit our YouTube Channel: iCostaRica24 ENjoY!
Gaia Hotel in Manuel Antonio Costa Rica- Where GAY goes to be GAY in Luxury.
Hey GUYS! If you read my other blog Doin' Costa Rica, you know I already posted about the Gaia Hotel and Reserve in Manual Antonio. BUT, what I didn't mention and what we don't mention in our VIDEO review of Gaia, is that it is EXTREMELY gay friendly. Technically, Gaia Hotel and Reserve labels itself as an 'ADULT ONLY' hotel... and let's be honest, that's a good thing. But anyway, guess who owns Gaia Hotel,,, 4 gay guys. Four gay guys that are also businessmen and not STUPID, so instead of trying to alienate or draw any particular group of people, they EMBRACE them ALL. So 'ADULT ONLY' works. Besides, I don't mind the term, 'ADULT ONLY', I think it is a much better term than 'gay friendly' or 'straight friendly', and I think most people are smart enough to know what the term implies.
Great PIC of Gaia Hotel taken from the highest point of the Reserve located on the property.
One of the owners of Gaia was telling me that much of their clientele comes from Canada and Europe, which there, they could care less about 'gay' anyway, and when we were at Gaia that was surely the case... no one gave a fuck about our gayness, whether we were 'gay' frolicking in the pool... or having an intimate dinner at Gaia's 5-Star restaurant. Everyone just did their own thing like us and after doing 'our' own thing we'd usually end up socializing around the bar at the pool or in the restaurant. Needless to say, the BEST of both worlds- socializing and intimacy... in luxury of course...hehe.
This post is an FYI to anyone interested in staying at an extremely luxurious hotel with other like-minded adults- gay, straight or otherwise. Bottom line- we think Gaia Hotel and Reserve just might be the Manuel Antonio option you're looking for.
Here's our UPDATED video of Gaia Hotel and Reserve in Manuel Antonio. ENjoY!
TONS of Costa Rica Travel Info and VIDEOS on our website: Travel Costa Rica NOW and if you want to visit our YouTube Channel: iCostaRica24 ENjoY!
Gay Costa Rica? Gay-Friendly Costa Rica? Tolerant gay Costa Rica? Anti-gay? Would the REAL Gay Costa Rica please stand-up.
Bottom line- are Costa Ricans really THAT accepting of the 'gay' traveler?
The answer is kinda, sorta, "YES," but with a few caveats.
Let me explain. First, the Tourism Board here understood a long time ago, that GAY people have plenty of cash to spend, and after all, 'Green' is 'Green' no matter who's spending it. Technically, that's the answer. But I can tell you this, Costa Rica doesn't CARE if you're GAY necessarily, but they damn sure don't want to SEE GAY. Let me say that again-
"BUT they DAMN SURE don't want to SEE GAY."
So, here's our take on traveling Costa Rica as a gay person/couple (and a little bit about living here gay) and what you can expect. ENjoY!
TONS of Costa Rica Travel Info and VIDEOS on our website: Travel Costa Rica NOW and if you want to visit our YouTube Channel: iCostaRica24 ENjoY!
First it was called, 'Doin' Gay Costa Rica'. It was on 'Blogger'. It got flagged for 'ADULT' content and vanished into GOOGLE search engine oblivion. It was very frustrating because it was doing well in the search engines. It took me forever to switch it over to a Wordpress.com format because I'm NOT internet savvy, and even after I did make the switch, it was never the same again. I lost interest and concentrated on my regular blog, Doin' Costa Rica.
Now, they're telling me I have to come up with $125. to keep my domain name, DoinGAYCostaRica.com. That's not happening to keep around a .com that I don't even keep up and that no one reads (and then there's a little issue of money). So, I'm going BACK to my comfort ZONE, which is 'Blogger' and starting, TRAVEL GAY COSTA RICA NOW.
Be patient. I'll be re-posting OLD posts that are relevant to GAY Costa Rica.. and of course be writing NEW gay content.
TONS of Costa Rica Travel Info and VIDEOS on our website: Travel Costa Rica NOW and if you want to visit our YouTube Channel: iCostaRica24 ENjoY!
